A healthy majority of people — especially men — are all about the orgasm. It’s their sole focus in the game of sex. They can’t wait to get there. That magical point that it all leads up to. And, oh, my God, is it fantastic! But what is the rush? If this moment in time — these short few seconds — are so utterly spectacular, why would you be anxious to get to the end of the experience? They are clearly not thinking straight. Their genitals have assumed the role of the brain. If they were more contemplative about their sexual experiences, they would realize they are doing it all wrong. Thankfully, there are some people in the XXX world who understand and appreciate the benefits of a prolonged orgasm. Maybe too much so, sometimes. It is called edging, and it can be glorious.

Edging is, very simply, continuously delaying — or denying — someone’s orgasm, especially a man’s. There are varying degrees of it, as there are for most things sexual. When you are being edged by someone, you are without question in the role of the submissive. You are placing your pleasure firmly in the hands — sometimes literally — of a dominant who will ultimately decide when you can achieve orgasm. You can also edge yourself by stop-and-start motions when you are fucking someone. Edging is often relegated, though not strictly so, to the XXX gay world.

A dom will often restrain the sub’s hands so there is no chance for self-stimulation. The sub will be stimulated either manually or orally in a very slow, steady manner. When they are on the cusp of ejaculation, totally writhing and twitching with an aching need to explode, the dom will suddenly stop stimulating the sub’s penis. After a few minutes pass, the process will begin anew. Edging will leave you exhausted, yet hungry for more. It’s an XXX staple for a reason.

When you are having a woman over and you know that evening is going to be a sexual one, taking care of a few basics can help your night to run smoothly. Make sure that your place is somewhat clean. No, it doesn’t have to be ship shape by military standards, but give it a check to see that the bathroom is in decent shape, no clothes are strewn about, and the sink is clear of dishes. You don’t want a woman’s concerns over hygiene to over ride her libido when you can easily side step that complication.

Have at least a little bit of food in the house and at the ready. People tend to get hungry, especially after having great sex. Also, having some wine, cheese, crackers and fruit handy can be a nice prelude to starting to feel romantic and get things going. There is nothing seductive or sexy about whipping out a bunch of take out menus and going through them trying to decide what to get, calling in the order, etc.

Give yourself enough time to be ready and relaxed when your hot date begins. If you know you get home from work at six, don’t ask her to come over then. Invite her for seven so that you can decompress and put the pressures of the day behind you. It is extremely difficult to start a sex date in work mode and there is no reason for it, as you will have all night with her if things go well.

Just a little bit of planning can lead to a lot hot xxx dates.

#1: Whenever you give out your number to someone, say “text me” instead of “call me”. It puts less pressure on the receiver of the number.

#2: Don’t be boring when you text. Don’t say ‘Hi’ and leave it at that. Be creative, ask a questions or tell him/her something about your day. Ask what he or she is wearing. If you text with a simple “Hey” then the conversation will most likely be ignored.

#3: Don’t ‘accidentally’ text him or her. Some people use this as a method to gain attention and make the other person jealous but it usually doesn’t work.

#4: If you do receive a text, respond within 24 hours or it will seem like you aren’t at all interested.

#5: Do ask him or her out over text if you feel like the mood is right, but make sure to do it in a subtle, casual way. For example, text something along the lines of, “The General has a a sweet deal on beers after 5, want to grab one after work?”.

#6: Be wary of the timing of the text you receive. If he or she is only texting you after 10pm, you may be a booty call. Sorry to break it to you.

#7: Speaking of texting after hours, don’t ever text under the influence. You WILL regret the things you type. End of story. Try installing the beer goggles app on your phone if possible. It will prevent you from texting anyone on your “no text” list.

#8: Try not to use netspeak. Netspeak are little abbreviations like IDGAF(I don’t give a f**k). It shows signs of immaturity and unintelligent behavior.

Only some of these tips may be able to translate online, assuming video dating chat is in play. The important note you should always keep in the back of your head throughout the flirting process is: you are talking to another human being, not a piece of meat, don’t be a dick. Also, don’t be shy. The worst possible outcome is a rejection, but you aren’t losing anything because you never had anything to begin with. Look at a rejection as a break even and “on-to-the-next-one”.

The three key tips for successful flirting are timing, subtlety and body language.

Every interaction moves to a beat and if you can pick up on that beat and flow with the timing, you will succeed. For example, if you are at a bar and you notice a good looking woman who interests you, don’t approach her. Be aware of when she is looking at you and do something like accidentally spill your drink or trip over your shoelace. Don’t acknowledge her yet, but look up slowly, make eye contact, and subtlety shake your head like you are not impressed with yourself. I guarantee you will get a smile out of her.

Key signs that mean a woman is actually digging you are she will keep the conversation going, maybe she will touch your leg or shoulder, lean in toward you, and laugh at things you say [even the things that aren't funny].

A first date is a great opportunity for both you and your adult dating companion to open up and get to know each other. First dates tend to take the direction of an interview, and for good reason. The purpose of a first date is to find out as much about a person as you can to decide whether or not you are attracted to them and their personality and the way the live their life. Talk, chat and flirt the night away. A first date is a perfect portal to get to know someone beyond their physical attributes – which don’t play a part in a relationship at all, by the way – and know them on a deeper level. Having said that, there are a few things you should probably not mention on a first date; some things may be considered too personal, you may be giving ‘TMI’ or ‘too much information’ on a certain topic, or you may be revealing something about yourself that should definitely be saved for a later – much later – date. The best way to approach a first date is to pretend that you are first and foremost friends dating, and nothing more.

Never Mention Past Lovers:

It doesn’t matter if you sing their praises or talk smack about your past relationships, the man or woman you are PRESENTLY on a date with could probably not care less about your past relationships. This night is supposed to be about you and your new date, don’t focus on your past. In fact, if you go on and on about your past the person you are on a date with will become extremely bored and assume that you still have feelings for said person you are talking about.

Never Talk Marriage Or Children:

If you start to blab about your love for children and how you want to have seven and adopt three and get married within the next year and move to the suburbs and live in a house with a red front door and white picket fence you may scare your date so much that he or she may get up and leave ASAP.

Never Talk Politics:

Politics is a bad topic in general to discuss on a first date. Talking about topics in the news to make conversation is perfectly fine but be careful about heated discussions starting over right-wing versus left-ring beliefs. There is no point in discussing personal political beliefs because that is exactly what they are – personal! If you decide amongst yourselves that it is okay to discuss after asking politely “Would you mind if I ask your opinion on this subject matter” then that is okay, otherwise steer clear.

Never Talk Religion:

It can be extremely offensive and disrespectful to get into a religious debate or conversation with someone on a first date. Religious beliefs shouldn’t even matter when you’re on a first date.

What does your pre sex chat usually sound like?

@Bettybo-Op: “No glove, no love”

@JohnnyVickers: “Can I cry during?”

@GillTxFOTO: “Well this is awkward”

@_Happy_Gilmore_: Kim Kardashian’s #4WordsBeforeSex “Is the camera on?”

@lilly40: “I love you baby”

@ohhmyguss: “Wait, close the door”

@StefanDjoker: “We are just friends”

@aldeanp: “You’re not Taylor Lautner”

@elisedmoore: “My mother likes you”

@Mad_fat_girl: “I am a professional”

@JoshUAfool: “Your dog is watching”

@lil_hammock: “Follow me on Twitter”

@StevenBayShore: “Prepare to be disappointed”

@ShamillaLondon: “Are you falling asleep?”

@KJRENAE: “Relax, close your eyes”

@UntouchableYann: “Turn the music up”

@DJCHAMPISHERE: “What’s ur name again?”

@iamboabie: “With or without sock?”

@sbeenken: “You’re not Tom Selleck!”

1. Have A Friend Call You

Have a good friend call you at a certain time. If the date is going well, bull shit something and get off of the phone quick. If the date is going bad, say a certain keyword and pretend you have to get home because your roommate has to take your cat to the vet or you are missing an important last minute Skype meeting with your boss from out of town, etc.

2. Have Something To Talk About In Case The Conversation Dies

What do you know about this person? What do you know about their hobbies, interests, etc? Make sure to have a few questions to ask them just in case the conversation dies down. Its always important to avoid an awkward silence.

3. Have A List Of Ailments You Can Throw At Him Or Her To Get Out

If the date is really bad, you need to leave. But you probably don’t want to get up and go without giving and excuse. Say you IBS is acting up, you have a really early morning meeting, you think there was something wrong with what you ate, you have really bad cramps, etc.

Drunk sex, unfortunately happens a LOT more often than it should in my opinion. Sure, you may think you are having a great xxx time when you’re loaded and hooking up with that hot chick from the bar, but there is always the next morning blues. You know, when you wake up discovering weird bruises in places that don’t make sense, and that hot chick isn’t as hot as you remember, and when you think back on the sex you had the night before everything just seems like a sloppy nightmare and you cannot wait to leave, go home, shower and have a cocktail. Unfortunately this cocktail is the beginning to the vicious repeat cycle.

2. Stoned sex

Stoned sex can be a huge bust or the best thing you’ve ever experienced. Allow me to explain. When you are high off your ass you either want to make out for hours and explore each others bodies and have an out-of-body experience when you orgasm because being high and having sex is JUST THAT GOOD. OR you are a little too stoned to put any effort into banging and you’d rather just sit back, much out and watch a weird movie like Troll 2.

3. Morning sex

Morning sex is my personal favorite. Both men and women are at their sexual peak in the morning. If you can get past morning breath (which I’m pretty sure you can if you really want it) then you will experience the best sex of your life. Another attributing factor that makes morning sex so amazing is the fact that we are still in a dream-like state when we wake up which is like a natural high experience.

Exes

Sex
All wedding guests realize that sex will be on the newlyweds’ honeymoon agenda. Hence, they don’t need to be reminded of this. What’s even more cringe-inducing is when a speaker brings up all the xxx memories of bed-creaking and moans they heard through their college dorm walls. The worst offense, though, was from a father of the bride, who talked about CONCEIVING the lady in white. And speaking of procreating…

Kids
You may disagree with me on this, but hear me out: A bride-friend of mine wasn’t sure if she wanted to have children when she got married. One of the wedding toasters must not have gotten the memo because he went on and on (and on) about how he couldn’t wait for the bride and groom to reproduce, what their kids would look like, what their names would be, etc. It got so uncomfortable that the bride actually took the mic away, ending the speech. But I suppose if speakers are 1000 percent positive that the couple wants and can have children, it’s not so bad.

Drunken Escapades
Sure, wedding guests assume that brides and grooms have had some less-than-sober moments. In fact, brides and grooms may be inebriated during the wedding toasts. Still, neither is an excuse for bringing up sloppy situations, however amusing they may be.

Run-Ins With the Law
“Remember when we almost got arrested for public urination?” is a question that never needs to be asked (of course they remember it–or else they were too wasted or traumatized to process it) but especially not at a wedding reception.

They talked to each other so casually and open about going home and having sex, as plainly as if they were going home to wash dishes. They spoke about wanting to have the TV playing in the background or not, whose turn it was to do certain things, etc. in a normal, comfortable tone of voice.

This made me realize: how much easier and how less awkward would dates be if everyone just cut the crap like Larry and Jennifer and said exactly what was on their mind instead of playing games?

I’m thinking a LOT easier.

If you are the type of person who signs onto adult dating sites in order to meet people for xxx hook ups, this method of being straight up and saying exactly what is on your mind could be the perfect solution for you to guarantee a score. Girls hate game. Guys tend to play them.

Be straight up, YO!